My Little Spyder's Face
He looks so much like a healthy baby. In this picture, you can see his eyes, nose, and mouth. Nothing looks wrong; it all looks perfect.
But, all of the doctors know he won't survive. They have told me that they will deliver him regardless of his position, which at this time is oblique - pretty much laying across the top of my belly. Their priority is my health, not his. As a mother, how can I allow that? I would sacrifice everything for him. But they won't let me.
I cannot express how much I want him to be born alive.
I want him to feel our touch and I want to feel his. But, really, I want Brad to get to hold him. I have had the past 30 weeks with the little guy, and Brad has only gotten to see images of him. Brad needs to get to connect to his son and hold him and know that he's real. I hope he gets that chance.